Sunday 3 June 2007

Style Guide

A note to our contributors:

Truth, as we know, is hard to find and sometimes you will have to resort to the use of facts. It's recommended that no more than 10% of any post should be verifiable. Just enough to give the reader confidence in the real story. To learn from the masters: ENTER THE RABBIT HOLE!! NOW!!

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Can we also have plenty of anniemachons oops! animations such as all-seeing blinking eyes in pyramids because these really help to get the TRUTH across to the sheeple!!!!!

paul said...

An excellent illustration of the correct fact:truth ratio

Notice how well you can get the message across without any foundation in reality.

I think the presentation could be brightened up a bit. I'd have all instances of iran in bright red fraktur

Still, much to learn from it, and these lads have been in the game a lot longer than us.

paul said...

all-seeing blinking eyes

I think that would be really nice

Anonymous said...

Still, much to learn from it, and these lads have been in the game a lot longer than us.

Yoyo Hair and Yasmin Ali-Baba and the forty million information thieves call that being a "professional journalist".

Go figure.

The Antagonist said...

Great post, only I notice you haven't used PURPLE THE ONE TRUE COLOUR OF TRUTH VIBRATION!

Now, where did I put my turquoise and green shell suit....?

Stef said...

Whilst I applaud minimising the use of potentially confusing or troubling facts in any article as a general case, I still think there should be some scope for writing well-researched factual articles that only adhere to Conspiraloony™ principles and drop a bollock in the last couple of sentences

They're my favourite

paul said...

They're my favourite
Mine too, henceforth the style guide can be completely ignored.

Bridget said...

Paul is this presentation of the terrible threat Iran holds for the world bright enough?

I actually learned something from reading it:

"In the 80’s, Iran’s leaders changed Tehran’s Churchill Street — home to the British Embassy — to Bobby Sands Street. They wanted to honour the IRA hunger striker — and wind up the Brits".

paul said...

It shows that the truth is out there, if you know where to look.
Only one condom factory? They like football?
God bless News International.

Bridget said...

Fuck me it appears the Sun couldn't even get that little gem right!

British Embassy Tehran

paul said...

Don't dis the news international

Bridget said...

I stand corrected and for the first time in my life I have to admit The Sun got it right. Nice piece of moral equivalance from the British Ambassador:

He reportedly did this by asking an Iranian official how he would like the street flanking the London mission renamed after the deposed Shah.

paul said...

Paul is this presentation of the terrible threat Iran holds for the world bright enough?

The more I look at it, the closer it conforms to the style guide. weird pictures, a terrible urgency in its typography and the sparing use of facts in getting its message across

Two well deserved thumbs up from me.

The Antagonist said...

You've only got two thumbs? Phew, at least you're not one of the them!

paul said...

But how do you know there not on the same hand?

The Antagonist said...

Shit! I hadn't thought of that.

While we're on the subject, could you explain why your thumbs are "well deserved"?

paul said...

Well if i hadn't made such splendid use of the first set, i wouldn't have been blessed with another on each hand.
Its great for going one better and high sixing people.

jon doy™ said...

you species should count yourselves lucky, i have a thumb where my arse should be and and arseholes where my thumbs would be

don't ask what i have to do to 'thumb' a lift...it's kind of a three way catch 22

on the plus side if anyone pisses me off i can take a dump in their pint without their noticing

paul said...

<high sixes fellow mutant porch monkey />

The Antagonist said...

What happened to the style guide? I came back to check a few stylistic flourishes before I spread a bit more truth and it's nowhere to be seen!?!

paul said...

I thought that the point of it, that there's plenty conspiracy grade reporting in the mainstream media, only emerged after I had done it. So I decided to cut to the chase.

You don't need it, you're a natural

Anonymous said...

conspiraloon™ trade mark? but i see no trading here.
looking for some tin-foil-wear. don't see nothing here. this a style guide? pah!

whats with the 32 digit count at the bottom of the page? should be 33 digits! you're not taking this seriously enough.

The Antagonist said...

mindless wanker: 32 digits is the Conspiraloon™ counter limit, no doubt due to another shapeshifting Masonic lizard conspiracy that has yet to be brought to the attention of the general public.