Voluntary Human Extinction - You Know It Makes Sense

.

Would you like to know more?

.

An important message from the Grand Master

I have been asked to pass on an important announcement from our branch representative on the Conspiraloon™ High Council.

It reads...




Kameraden,


I bring you sad tidings

You will all, of course, be aware that the Conspiraloon™ movement has been struck by a series of mortal blows in recent days, including:

• Exposure of our secret network of invisible nazi cannibal child molestation animal cruelty race HATE forums
  
  
• Revelations that we hold extreme right wing beliefs so EVIL that we do not express them publicly, or amongst ourselves, or even think about them
  
  
• Publication of testimony by the world's leading scienticians which conclusively PROVES that mistrust of the establishment is an UNDENIABLE form of mental illness
  
  
• The SHOCKING news that the State Broadcasting Company is producing a television program which will ridicule us for saying NAUGHTY things about the State. This is in spite of the fact that we were extremely polite when we told the BBC to go fuck itself several months ago

The result has been an almost total shutdown of Conspiraloon™ operations across the globe and almost certainly an end to the occupation of Iraq, the neutralisation of terrorism as a threat to the British way of life and the demise of finance capital as a force for evil

Alliance members are understandably demoralized and despondent


At this point in time it is clear to me that only one course of action is open to us


We must start insulting each other publicly and brutally, pausing only to heap fulsome praise on the most demented comments made by anonymous contributors, and we must do it NOW!!


My fellow Loons, The thread is open...


ttfn,

The Secret Grand Master
xxx

recently declassified CCTV footage of a detachment of Conspiraloon™ Stormtroopers on the receiving end of a right old pwning from heroic True™ Truth™ Seekers

.

Film Special

The Alliance's notoriously unreliable show business sources inform us that the cruelly overrated Sacha Baron Cohen is all set to exhume his hit comedy character 'Borat' in a sequel set in present day Gaza.

Mr Cohen ,whose 'modus hilarity' might well be described as 'by way of deception', is clearly concerned about the rise of anti semitism there.

"It's a responsibility I cannot shirk." said the oscar nominee. "It's close to my home in Tel Aviv and the economic situation means I can pay even less than those peasants got in Romania".

Ever the optimist, and a great believer in the healing power of laughter, he continued:

"One of the great things is I can re-use so much material! I can appear at a burst sewage tank and shout 'It's all the fucking jews' while dancing around the children drowned in shit."

"If someone gets hit by an airstrike I'll say 'This is jew work', that way they'll realise it's their own fault!"

He remains aware that the situation on the ground might pose some production problems:

"It'll be hard to work in the 'Throw a jew down the well' song, as there isn't any drinking water in that area anymore" the perfectionist reflected morosely.

Naturally, there's a serious side to this comedy zionist's project:
Through his light hearted strategy, he hopes to enlighten the residents of Gaza regarding their resentment of the chosen people. He says of his character:

"By himself being anti-Semitic, he lets people lower their guard and expose their own prejudice, whether it's anti-Semitism or an acceptance of anti-Semitism. I want them to realise this before we finally get rid of them all"

Some might wonder if his unique brand of humour will be relevant amongst the carnage of a military occupation and the brutal privations of illegal collective punishment by Israel's army.
The supremacist golden globe winner was quick to counter:

"Before I worked at Goldman Sachs I studied the Holocaust at Cambridge, and this situation is completely different from the Warsaw Ghetto. I don't have to point out there are no jews inside Gaza"


Visibly moved, he tugged at his director's cut schindler's list t-shirt and explained how he wanted to reach out, past their worthless parents, to Gaza's young. He hoped they would join his youth club - Habonim Dror.

"We don't sit around feeling sorry for ourselves just because we have no food or electricity" he says passionately "...we learn about leadership, the genocide in Darfur and how brave soldiers die trying to steal Lebanon's water"

Both Labour and Conservative 'Enemies of Palestine' parliamentary pressure groups are as enthusiastic about this project as they are about the liberation of Gaza's gas deposits from their rightful owners. They urged Gordon Brown to support it. In response, the fat cunt reiterated part of last years speech to them:

"When I was growing up, Kirkcaldy and Tel Aviv were linked very closely because my father used to spend many weeks in Israel...I learned very young of the struggles, the sacrifices the achievements of the new state of Israel and, as long as they're writing the cheques, the Palestinians can go fuck themselves."

Horrific Photgraphs of murdered palestinians courtesy of Progressive Independent