Monday, 4 June 2007

Style Guide Redux

The world wide internet has given us the tools to deliver the truth with an eye-watering impact that previous generations could only dream of:
A rainbow of truthful colours
Fonts both great and small
text that blinks with the same urgency as your message
images liberated almost entirely from meaning:

And of course the sacred sign of the double exclamation!!
Use them all, while you still can!!
Remember, careful with those facts, they always get in the way of the truth
An eagle eyed commentor NOTICED that the beast already employs some of these mad skillz.......................for evil!!
Don't believe me?
Take the Red Top Pill!! Now!!


Jon Doy said...

i would reply with a non-non sequitor but i cannot hear myself think because i'm inundated with black helicopters at the moment

this has been Jon Doy reporting, from under the sofa

Jon Doy said...

nearly forgot, nice use of visible spectrum colours there, but i really think you should upgrade to the pre-ultrared and sub-hyperviolet non visible megacolours for ultimate TRUTH™iness

must go, alex fucking jones is outside with his bullhorn now... "piss off AJ, i'm not buying TERRASCHTORM, it's on google video"

Kenadie said...

It's non sequitur - and you're not fooling anyone, skater boy ;)

Jon Doy said...

kenadie: i'm sorry but that is the correct zeta reticulan spelling

"skater boy" ? i have no idea what you mean, i cannot believe that on this conspiraloon™ blog there is a conspiracy theory about who i might be under this other dimensional skin/shellsuit combo

i know not what skater boy is, but i have a reptilian 'gator toy' - with removable tony blair skin - will that do ?

paul said...

Living under a sofa? Terrorised by alex jones?
We're to help!

Jon Doy said...

thank you Paul, i'm relieved as fuck because if his millenium bug predictions are anything to go by, the deep sea port invasion of America by Chinese automobiles is going to be a massacre when they unfold and stand up and take their TRUE!™ form as giant robots with plasmoid firing shoulder launchers and particle beam headlamp eyes

wow, this acid is good

i mean: WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

alexa junta said...

I'll be round with my horny bull in the morning

paul said...

Personally, Alex Jones doesn't bother me too much. if I was offered a cosmos where he was the biggest problem, I'd buy that for a dollar.

Kenadie said...

Alex Jones is the kind of person I would take a bullet in the chest for - as long as I never had to meet him.

Jon Doy....your secret is safe with me, don't worry. I won't tell anyone how last time we went out to dinner you created a scene by insisting that the chef had embedded RFID chips in your dover sole.

Jon Doy said...

when was the last time you saw blinking leds on peppercorns...of course they were rfid chips, that's why we got a bill for the disposal of our waste by-product from our previous visit tacked on to the bill that last time...i wouldn't have minded but the amount of turd-miles we were charged for was ridiculous

i mean: no, really, i'm not skater boy, although a fish supper does appeal, i'm pretty sure it wasn't me

Jon Doy's dover sole said...

For f**k's sake....there he goes denying it again.

Jon Doy said...

i thought it was the particle beam mind ray causing the coloured lights and music, but i think i figured out who and what you are kenadie

it's you who's been stealing my thoughts and replacing them with your master's own isn't it ?

watch out people, once kenadie utters certain keywords i might go psycho, but before i do i must deal with this talking dover sole..."look pal, i know you're not jesus - you're a dead and cooked fish"

oh great, now my fork is slagging off the knife