A Special Conspiraloon Special Exclusive Special Extra, courtesy of Conspiraloon guest writer, jtf.
The Chinchillian Foundation was set up last year with the aim of steering youngsters away from being rabbitalised. The Foundation is named after 18th century rogue and pamphleteer Maximillian Chinchillian, who travelled the length and breadth of the Midlands preaching guerrilla resistance against the British.
It aims to steer easily-led youths towards a path of non-confrontational passive dialogue leading to a wider consensus between communities and an overall cohesive pudding of social inclusion, keeping our democracy vibrant well into the new age. This is costing £4 billion over 2 years, before the Foundation is wound up and the principal players move to Majorca.
Hassan Butt, who claimed to have been a rabbit all the way from 1998 to 2002, told how he was met at the gates of a prestigious university by a large rabbit all whiskery. He was taken to a community centre where images of conflict were projected onto a giant carrot. By the time he came away an hour later he was sporting a prodigious beard, and determined to rabbitalise all his friends and known associates.
Butt was interviewed in several highly regarded media outlets, relating how he had met many lethal rabbits, trained 400 chinchillas in the arts of war, and finally renounced rabbitalism to keep a low profile with his face in the daily press.
However, the police have now announced that Mr. Butt was 'almost certainly' not a rabbit all along. A spokesperson for the Chinchillian foundation said "That's OK, we've got a dozen more like him in a cupboard somewhere. This does not affect our funding in any way."