Tuesday, 17 February 2009

Here We Go Again

A big problem with the many thousands of terrorfascists is that they all look alike to our innocent western eyes. For example, cast your gaze over these lads.

Do they perhaps remind you of these lads?

That's because they are,unbelievably, the same.

Even though The Department of Terror claims thousands of deadly plotters, it seems to prefer trying the mentally impaired, the mentally impaired and this bunch, who seem pretty mentally impaired.

This has not, however triggered a class memory amongst the news hounds of the hated mainstream media. It's not yesterday's news to them.

Not a single report mentioned the failure to convict them over the airline bomb plot last year.
It's highly probable they are experiencing a temporal dislocation similar to that popularised by the revisionist police drama; 'Life on Mars', and they are all reporting from the past.

It would be understandable as the shocking, chilling details are eerily alike.

Mr Wright, prosecutor, spouting rubbish about what might have happened if everything had been completely different, the same eviltronic memory sticks and the fucking juice bottles of death.
Is this then, or is it now?

It's true what they say, there are too many repeats on these days. This edition must contain some hilarious behind the scenes out-takes, as it's set for a mammoth ten month run, compared with the lean six of the first trial. Who knows, might we see a surprise guest appearance from the allegedly dead alleged mastermind Rashid Rauf?

Still, if you'd spent £37 million sterling (back in the days when a pound was a pound) you'd want another go I suppose.

Update: For legal reasons the latest jury has been discharged, poor old Mr Wright will have to do his Vincent Price act all over again.

That'll cost a few bob.

More over at aangirfan.

Thursday, 12 February 2009


A classic example of pseudo martyrdom stunt cockery.

Gert is outspoken
Gert is charismatic
Gert says what elites really think
Gert says what wants to be heard
Gerts life is in danger
but Gerty is crafty and refuses to take life seriously

If you do not want to know anything, you have come to the very right place.

Our administration deplores open hatred,but appreciates its managed, milked appeal.

A thoughtful, stunned bystander might wonder what we can learn from an acolyte of the demented monster bolkenstein . A man whose only dream was to drag the untermenschen to an east european state of dejection.

Of course, with the contingent mind of the psychopath, he applies only his concerns to the damage done by the darkies, and casts his gaze away from the glut of whitish European labour capital he imagines queuing to wipe his illuminated and rotting arsehole.

As a fellow human socialised within roman catholicism, I can appreciate gerty's discomfort with an entirely alien culture. However, I am unhappy to witness his witless abjection to the most gruesome fundamentalist states in his imaginary battle for our future.

The home secretary should recognise that it takes far more than a single, wild haired fascist to get the jackboots on the march. A concerted, persistent pan-media programme of demonisation is required, and that has been operating for years.

As an enthusiast for free speech, I cannot but support gerty's anti-human ravings, as a little,purely natural, sunshine will reveal him to be of the same, dessicated sociopathic cast as our own demented melanie philips. The hag philips, of course, has openly said much the same as the dutch lightning rod, as has that epitome of the ugly drunk, nicholas cohen and his sly,creepy, zionist big brother, david.

Gerty's the real thing. Agressive, charismatic and life hating.

I think he should be heard.

Let's see the real thing.

Wednesday, 11 February 2009

Foundation Frenzy: The Chinchillian Foundation

A Special Conspiraloon Special Exclusive Special Extra, courtesy of Conspiraloon guest writer, jtf.

The Chinchillian Foundation was set up last year with the aim of steering youngsters away from being rabbitalised. The Foundation is named after 18th century rogue and pamphleteer Maximillian Chinchillian, who travelled the length and breadth of the Midlands preaching guerrilla resistance against the British.

It aims to steer easily-led youths towards a path of non-confrontational passive dialogue leading to a wider consensus between communities and an overall cohesive pudding of social inclusion, keeping our democracy vibrant well into the new age. This is costing £4 billion over 2 years, before the Foundation is wound up and the principal players move to Majorca.

Hassan Butt was an impressionable young critter

Hassan Butt, who claimed to have been a rabbit all the way from 1998 to 2002, told how he was met at the gates of a prestigious university by a large rabbit all whiskery. He was taken to a community centre where images of conflict were projected onto a giant carrot. By the time he came away an hour later he was sporting a prodigious beard, and determined to rabbitalise all his friends and known associates.

Butt pictured in his student days after 'rabbitalisation'

Butt was interviewed in several highly regarded media outlets, relating how he had met many lethal rabbits, trained 400 chinchillas in the arts of war, and finally renounced rabbitalism to keep a low profile with his face in the daily press.

Questions are now being raised over the veracity of Mr. Butt's adventures

However, the police have now announced that Mr. Butt was 'almost certainly' not a rabbit all along. A spokesperson for the Chinchillian foundation said "That's OK, we've got a dozen more like him in a cupboard somewhere. This does not affect our funding in any way."

Sunday, 8 February 2009

Herring-Served Red

The hated mainstream media rises up to condemn the greedy bankers:
Darling orders urgent inquiry to report something or other at a later date

Public owned bank returns to normal behaviour
Strange, as this dreadful situation would seem to be one of the simpler, and certainly financially irrelevant ,aspects of the crunchtastrophe to deal with.

They have long taunted us with threats to go to an unidentified elsewhere. Perhaps the time has come for us to let them go?

But, as the aristocrat of alternative news pointedly enquires, the real question is: where's the rest of the fucking money gone?

Friday, 6 February 2009

Nuts Can Be Harmful

Example given: a limp salad of mixed platitudes, sprinkled with croutons of pseudo-erudtion, smothered in a greasy, tasteless dressing; one part self aggrandisement to five parts self pity.
The mind behind the words may deny analysis, but the words reveal all.
Our Middle East envoy,finance flunkey and worthless panderer to power speaks:

It is an honour to be here. A particular honour to be with you Mr. President. The world participated in the celebration of your election. Now the hard work begins. And now, also we should be as steadfast for you in the hard work as in the celebration. You don’t need cheerleaders but partners; not spectators but supporters. The truest friends are those still around when the going is toughest. We offer you our friendship today. We will work with you to make your Presidency one that shapes our destiny to the credit of America and of the world. Mr President, we salute you and wish you well.

After 10 years as British Prime Minister, I decided to choose something easy. I became involved in the Middle East Peace Process.

There are many frustrations – that is evident. There is also one blessing. I spend much of my time in the Holy Land and in the Holy City. The other evening I climbed to the top of Notre Dame in Jerusalem. You look left and see the Garden of Gethsemane. You look right and see where the Last Supper was held. Straight ahead lies Golgotha. In the distance is where King David was crowned and still further where Abraham was laid to rest. And of course in the centre of Jerusalem is the Al Aqsa Mosque, where according to the Qur’an, the Prophet was transported to commune with the prophets of the past.

Rich in conflict, it is also sublime in history. The other month in Jericho, I visited the Mount of Temptation. I think they bring all the political leaders there. My guide – a Palestinian – was bemoaning the travails of his nation. Suddenly he stopped, looked heaven wards and said “Moses, Jesus, Mohammed: why did they all have to come here?”

It is a good place to reflect on religion: a source of so much inspiration; an excuse for so much evil.

Today, religion is under attack from without and from within. From within, it is corroded by extremists who use their faith as a means of excluding the other. I am what I am in opposition to you. If you do not believe as I believe, you are a lesser human being.

From without, religious faith is assailed by an increasingly aggressive secularism, which derides faith as contrary to reason and defines faith by conflict. Thus do the extreme believers and the aggressive non-believers come together in unholy alliance.

And yet, faith will not be so easily cast. For billions of people, faith motivates, galvanises, compels and inspires, not to exclude but to embrace; not to provoke conflict but to try to do good. This is faith in action. You can see it in countless local communities where those from churches, mosques, synagogues and temples, tend the sick, care for the afflicted, work long hours in bad conditions to bring hope to the despairing and salvation to the lost. You can see it in the arousing of the world’s conscience to the plight of Africa.

There are a million good deeds done every day by people of faith. These are those for whom, in the parable of the sower, the seed fell on good soil and yielded sixty or a hundredfold.

What inspires such people?

Ritual or doctrine or the finer points of theology? No.

I remember my first spiritual awakening. I was ten years old. That day my father – at the young age of 40 – had suffered a serious stroke. His life hung in the balance. My mother, to keep some sense of normality in the crisis, sent me to school. My teacher knelt and prayed with me. Now my father was a militant atheist. Before we prayed, I thought I should confess this. “I’m afraid my father doesn’t believe in God”. I said. “That doesn’t matter” my teacher replied “God believes in him. He loves him without demanding or needing love in return.”

That is what inspires: the unconditional nature of God’s love. A promise perpetually kept. A covenant never broken.

And in surrendering to God, we become instruments of that love.

Rabbi Hillel was once challenged by a pagan, who said: if you can recite the whole of the Torah standing on one leg, I will convert to being a Jew. Rabbi Hillel stood on one leg and said “That which is hateful to you, do it not unto your neighbour. That is the Torah. Everything else is commentary. Go and study it.”

As the Qur’an states: “if anyone saves a person it will be as if he has saved the whole of humanity”.

Faith is not discovered in acting according to ritual but acting according to God’s will and God’s will is love.

We might also talk of the Hindu “Living beyond the reach of I and mine” or the words of the Buddha “after practising enlightenment you must go back to practise compassion” or the Sikh scripture: “God’s bounties are common to all. It is we who have created divisions.”

Each faith has its beliefs. Each is different. Yet at a certain point each is in communion with the other.

Examine the impact of globalisation. Forget for a moment its rights and wrongs. Just look at its effects. Its characteristic is that it pushes the world together. It is not only an economic force. The consequence is social, even cultural.

The global community – “it takes a village” as someone once coined it – is upon us. Into it steps religious faith. If faith becomes the property of extremists, it will originate discord. But if, by contrast, different faiths can reach out to and have knowledge of one another, then instead of being reactionary, religious faith can be a force for progress.

The Foundation which bears my name and which I began less than a year ago is dedicated to achieving understanding, action and reconciliation between the different faiths for the common good. It is not about the faith that looks inward; but the faith that resolutely turns us towards each other.

Bringing the faith communities together fulfils an objective important to all of us, believers and non-believers.

But as someone of faith, this is not enough. I believe restoring religious faith to its rightful place, as the guide to our world and its future, is itself of the essence. The 21st Century will be poorer in spirit, meaner in ambition, less disciplined in conscience, if it is not under the guardianship of faith in God.

I do not mean by this to blur the correct distinction between the realms of religious and political authority. In Britain we are especially mindful of this. I recall giving an address to the country at a time of crisis. I wanted to end my words with “God bless the British people”. This caused complete consternation. Emergency meetings were convened. The system was aghast. Finally, as I sat trying to defend my words, a senior civil servant said, with utter distain: “Really, Prime Minister, this is not America you know.”

Neither do I decry the work of humanists, who give gladly of themselves for others and who can often shame the avowedly religious. Those who do God’s work are God’s people.

I only say that there are limits to humanism and beyond those limits God and only God can work. The phrase “fear of God” conjures up the vengeful God of parts of the Old Testament. But “fear of God” means really obedience to God; humility before God; acceptance through God that there is something bigger, better and more important than you. It is that humbling of man’s vanity, that stirring of conscience through God’s prompting, that recognition of our limitations, that faith alone can bestow.

We can perform acts of mercy, but only God can lend them dignity. We can forgive, but only God forgives completely in the full knowledge of our sin.

And only through God comes grace; and it is God’s grace that is unique.

John Newton, who had been that most obnoxious of things, a slave-trader, wrote the hymn “Amazing Grace”.

“Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear. And Grace, my fears relieved.”

It is through faith, by the Grace of God, that we have the courage to live as we should and die as we must.

When I was Prime Minister I had cause often to reflect on leadership. Courage in leadership is not simply about having the nerve to take difficult decisions or even in doing the right thing since oftentimes God alone knows what the right thing is.

It is to be in our natural state – which is one of nagging doubt, imperfect knowledge, and uncertain prediction – and to be prepared nonetheless to put on the mantle of responsibility and to stand up in full view of the world, to step out when others step back, to assume the loneliness of the final decision-maker, not sure of success but unsure of it.

And it is in that “not knowing” that the courage lies.

And when in that state, our courage fails, our faith can support it, lift it up, keep it from stumbling.

As you begin your leadership of this great country, Mr President, you are fortunate, as is your nation, that you have already shown in your life, courage in abundance. But should it ever be tested, I hope your faith can sustain you. And your family. The public eye is not always the most congenial.

I was reminded of this, as I waited in London in the snow to fly to America and made the mistake of reading a British newspaper. It was the very conservative Daily Telegraph. A few days ago I gave an interview in which I remarked how much cleverer my wife was than me. The Telegraph has a famous letters page. In it was a letter from a correspondent that read something like: “Dear Sir, with reference to your headline ‘Blair admits wife more intelligent than him’, I fail to see why this is news. Most of us have known this for a long time.” As a PS perhaps: “the bar, however, has not been set high”.

I finish where I began: in the Holy Land, at Mount Nebo in Jordan, where Moses gazed on the Promised Land. There is a chapel there, built by pilgrims in the 4th Century. The sermon was preached by an American, who spent his life as an airline pilot and then, after his wife’s death, took holy orders. His words are the words of a Christian but they speak to all those of faith, who want God’s grace to guide their life.

He said this:

“While here on earth, we need to make a vital decision ... whether to be mere spectators, or movers and shakers for the Kingdom of God... whether to stay among the curious, or take up a cross. And this means: no standing on the sidelines ... We’re either in the game or we’re not. I sometimes ask myself the question: If I were to die today, what would my life have stood for... The answer can’t be an impulsive one, and we all need to count the cost before we give an answer. Because to be able to say yes to one thing, means to say no to many others. But we must also remember, that the greatest danger is not impulsiveness, but inaction.”

It is fitting at this extraordinary moment in your country’s history that we hear that call to action; and we pray that in acting we do God’s work and follow God’s will.

And by the way, God bless you all.

I hope he remembered to take his headgear off before he started, the murdering, psychotic fuck.