The Alliance has been rocked by the looming defection of one of its charter members. I immediately analysed the ramifications of this using the alliance's most powerful super computer. The results were,frankly, shocking.
By moving his vast wealth offshore:
- airstrip one's currency collapses
- share prices plunge
- and ordinary people start eyeing up their families' gold fillings
Testing times clearly lie ahead, and I confess I was thrown into a deep depression . I racked by my brains for an answer....and then it came to me.......I picked up the phone and spoke to the one person who could help.
Julia Middleton (above), the surprisingly approachable leader of neo-masons, common purpose, was quick to grasp the situation. She swiftly made her way to the Alliance pyramid to plan for the coming apocalypse.
The first option, of turning the defector to stone, was dismissed. It would only forestall the cataclysm, not prevent it. A naval blockade, using a flotilla of Al Gore's ice borne,mind controlled polar bears, was also discussed and rejected.
It was then she revealed that we should court disaster, not avoid it. See this as an opportunity, not a crisis!!
she hissed, knuckles whitening around her wand
our diversity agenda will bring order out of chaos"
I nervously moved the subject on to what people would wear in this new order.
squeezing the shrunken,
mummified head of norman gerrish
hanging at her waist
"is between leaders and followers."
Clearly, this distinction would have to be open and transparent for people to accept their destiny. As most popular science fiction depicts everybody wearing uniforms, someone had to take charge of this matter....
Recognising our leading position in the world of conspiracy theories on the internet, she charged the Alliance with designing the common purpose fashionkampf clothing line.
Brothers and sisters, I am proud to present you with the LEADERSHIP range:
and the CITIZEN range:
When you're in with 'the purpose', you're made. Money flows directly from the Citizens to the Leadership. The synergetic coupling of our two great movements spells a rosy future for the Alliance....................